We went for lunch a few blocks down the street from the main office. I was happy to have friends to eat with while I was visiting. We sat in a sunny spot in a glassy corner of the restaurant. After the meal, one of them started telling a story.
“I went to a Giants game once,” he said.
I’m not sure what in our conversation led him to say this, It must have made sense at the time, but it escapes me now. In any event, with an opening like that, I pushed back into my seat to listen.
It was the fifth inning.
His story seemed to have taken place some time ago, but he remembered for heaven’s sake what inning it was. And he remembered who the Giants were playing. Heck, I’m not even sure as I sit here whether it was indeed the Giants or somebody else, but he not only remembered that detail and what inning it was, but he also remembered the score.
The Giants were ahead 4 to 1.
He told us that he had been drinking a beer, holding the can in his left hand. And he told us how now he had to keep holding it that way, not switching hands or changing anything else until the end of the game lest it jinx the lead and cost the team the game.
But you see, it was the fifth inning with plenty of time remaining. So he was stuck there in the stands for the second half of the game holding his beer in his left hand. Which he did. And sure enough the Giants won.
Later as he was taking the subway home, he felt a tap on his shoulder and turned around. It was a policeman who pointed to the beer can my friend was still holding.
You see, from that moment in the fifth inning he had not let go of it. Without even realizing it, he had left the ballpark and started home with it glued to his hand with only a tiny amount of beer remaining. And now here he was. And the tiny amount in that open container was enough for the policeman to start writing a ticket.
Oh come on, my friend said. This is kinda like… kinda like… you know when you come home from the gym and realize that you’ve still got one of their towels.
The policeman looked up and said, Oh I hate that. It always happens to me!
You see? You see!? This is just like that, my friend said.
But I’m still writing you the ticket.
And that was that. End of story.